It just...happened

April 2003


"Wait,  back it up, you slept with him?" Alicia's eyes were wide and she couldn't hold her smile even if she tried.

"Yes,  but I don't know what it means, I mean it's not like we planned it, it just happened. " Now I was the one who couldn't hide a smile. It was Sunday morning and I was telling Alicia all about my weekend.

Jacob lived kinda far from his campus in a newer stucco suburban neighborhood. 

"Pretty big place to live on your own," we were standing at the kitchen island and he was pouring two glasses of wine. 

"Yeah, I have two roommates but they are never around so it gets pretty quiet." He handed me the glass.  "Here, I'm not much of a wine drinker so hopefully you like it. My mother brings bottles down when she visits,  she wants to be the 'cool' mom since her and dad split." He rolled his eyes at the comment about his mom. 

"Why did they split anyways, they always seemed so happy when we were kids?" I took a sip of wine,  it was a little bitter on my tongue but sweet enough for my liking.

"Well, mom had a midlife crisis, started dressing different, hanging out with new friends and long story short, she cheated. She didn't even look remorseful the night she told Amanda and I.  I get that my dad was putting in too many hours but I'd never think she would be capable of that."  I noticed his jaw tighten. I could tell I hit a nerve, I don't blame him I don't know how I would feel if my parents split especially for reasons like infidelity.

" I'm sorry, I don't really know what to say. Cheating sucks!" 

"Yeah it does, I hate it, I would never do that to my kids or wife." He took a large gulp of wine and shook his head. "Listen, enough sad talk, want a tour?"

He led me to the living room which was large but pretty bare. The backyard was small, with a picnic table and barbecue. I followed him upstairs where he pointed out three closed doors. His roommates were paying his dad and worked nights so the house was empty.  Last he showed me his room.

"I moved into the master when my dad moved out." It was a very large room with a king size mattress on the floor and several basketball posters on the wall above it.  Just like the rest of the house the room was fairly bare. The attached bathroom was gorgeous with light marble countertops, his and her sinks and the biggest spa tub I've seen. My mind wandered as I envisioned spending time soaking in it...with Jacob.

"I know it's definitely a bachelor pad." He laughed when I was looking at another poster he had on the closet door. This one wasn't bad, it was a surfer riding a very large wave. The water was more green then San Diego so I asked where the picture was taken.  

"North Shore, Oahu.  I can't wait to go someday. I went as a kid but that was back before I surfed so we never stopped to watch the surf.  Amanda and I did get lost in a bamboo forrest though." He then proceeded to tell me how that happened and how every turn they made was dictated by Amanda but just got them more and more lost.  

"I finally took over and we made it to a road, my dad drove by about 10 minutes later. He was upset and of course Amanda blamed it on me."

"Sounds like Amanda," I said with a laugh. 
We were now sitting on the bed facing each other. 

"You have a beautiful laugh Jujie." Jacob said this almost too low to hear.  I grinned so wide though, he had to know I heard.

"You remember when we kissed in my backyard when we were 13?"  OK I know I said I was happy staying friends but I kept looking at his lips and wondering if his lips taste just as nice as they did years earlier.

"I do, I also remember how quickly you backed away and how you never talked about it ever again." He smiled at me.

"Your sister was coming and you never talked about it either." I breathed out and noticed my heart was starting to race as if my body knew what was about to happen but my mind hadn't caught up. He scooted closer and put a hand on my knee.

"This is the part where I kiss you." He leaned in, my chest was now pounding I hope he didn't notice.

"You're not supposed to tell me, you're just supp..." and that's when he cut me off and connected the space between us. His lips were soft and I opened my mouth for more. His kiss was as sweet as that day when we were 13, it was more demanding now. I could tell he had perfected it and I didn't want it to end. He lightly bit my lower lip and pulled back. I was panting and smiled at him before I dove back in for more. I lifted his shirt slowly off and began kissing his shoulder. His shoulder muscles were so nicely defined I thought as I moved to kiss his neck.  He lifted me to him and I straddled his lap. He quickly tugged at my shirt and didn't waste time with removing my bra. 

"God you're breathtaking," he said as he leaned back and met my eyes. Right then I paused. I don't know if we were going to all of sudden be together after tonight or if ever but I had absolutely no doubt in my mind that I wanted him to be my first. I placed a hand on his jaw and looked back into those piercing eyes.

"Make love to me," I wasn't asking.  I got up and removed my jeans and was grateful I picked my lace undies tonight.  He put his hands to my hips and slid them off. He got up and went to his dresser fetching protection. He then removed his jeans and laid back down. I joined him again on the bed and he leaned over me. A giggle escaped my throat.

"Sorry, it's not funny, I think I'm just a little nervous."

"Never apologize, we can stop if you want?"
I shook my head and pulled him to me. We spent the next hour between the sheets and I was surprised at how wonderful it was. I was always told your first time would hurt and be uncomfortable.  I will admit at first it was a little uncomfortable but he kept kissing me and touching me, I was too distracted to notice anything but the way his mouth felt on my skin. When we finished I laid in his arms for awhile before he went to the bathroom to clean up. I don't remember when but the next thing I remember was waking up naked in Jacob's bed. I smiled and then panicked hopping up to make sure I didn't look like a mess. I frowned in the mirror at my reflection. I had some dried drool on my cheek and black smudged mascara.  I quickly washed my face and got back in bed. I was glad I hadn't woken Jacob. 

"What happened to racoon eyes?" Busted, I turned to see his smiling face. I rolled my eyes and sat up holding the sheet to my chest.

"Hungry?" 

"Oh yeah," he grabbed the sheet and pulled.

"As much as I would love to stay here I'm starving and have a class at noon." I kissed him and jumped up to dress.  We then went out for pancakes and he drove me home.


"I don't know what's going to happen, but I'm sure enjoying whatever it is right now. He has told me before he's not ready for a full on relationship. And as much as a part of me just wants to run away with him into the sunset, I don't think one great night means we're there yet, if ever."

"Well I don't know what will happen either but I'm really glad your first time was way better then mine. " Alicia scrunched her face at the memory.

"Ten second Timmy, " I laughed. She threw a pillow at me and told me to shut up.

"It was longer then ten seconds," she was holding her smile until she finally burst out laughing. "Listen, I tell myself it's because he was just sooo attracted to me, he couldn't hold it. "

We spent the rest of the night recounting the guys she's been with,  most were jerks or idiots. Except Dean, she must of noticed my sudden silence because she interrupted my thoughts, I didn't hear her at first so I asked her to repeat.

"I talked to Dean, he wants to do dinner Tuesday night."